tongue and groove

Mill Valley

(snapped a few years ago one evening when J was playing at Sweetwater with Joe Louis Walker)

seeing Linda's post about Joe's Taco Lounge in Mill Valley instantly made me want to spend a day there. in Mill Valley, i mean, not the taco lounge...though given how much i love tacos, that wouldn't be outside the realm of possibility.

Mill Valley and i go way back. somewhere around 1980-81, i lived there briefly, in a house on the east side of town with two roommates. one was an old friend, a dancer and choreographer; the other was someone i didn't know, a Scientologist who worked at Heath Ceramics in Sausalito.

i was working at an upscale men's and women's boutique in the heart of downtown Mill Valley, on the corner of Miller and Throckmorton. (the last time i was there, a coffee place was in that space.) it was a store geared to the affluent Mill Valley crowd...$400 linen shirts for women, Italian gabardine slacks for men, Lucchese boots. i was paid the whopping sum of $5/hour and was basically in charge since the owner and her partner mostly hung out in the office in the back.

one day a quiet, middle-aged man came in and purchased some slacks. i recognized the name on his credit card. he changed into his new slacks and as i kneeled on the hardwood floor to pin the hems (did i mention that my $5/hour, no commission pay included having to hem every pair of slacks i sold?), i thought how odd it was to have come of age during the Watergate era and now find myself hemming the pants of Daniel Ellsberg. Jim Lange shopped there. i once waited on a barefoot, coked-out woman in ratty jeans who paid for her purchases with a huge wad of hundred dollar bills she had stashed in her pocket.

the first time i ever saw a car phone (back when cell phones were car phones) was while working at that job. i was standing at the counter when i saw a guy in a gold Mercedes convertible (of course) turn left onto Throckmorton. i thought, "was that...? was he holding a phone?!" it looked like something out of Get Smart.  :)

after work, i'd walk around the corner to Sweetwater, sit at the bar and have a glass (or two or three) of white wine. i've spent many a night in Sweetwater--seen lots of live music there. it was  probably my all-time favorite music venue and i was heartbroken when it closed. a friend of mine in Marin actually looked at buying it at one point in the late 90's. i was also sad when Village Music closed since it was one of the most amazing record stores in the country. maybe i sound like an aging baby boomer whining over the old days, but these were cultural institutions. (if you don't believe me, start Googling.) and to replaced by what? another cupcake store?

in the evenings i'd sometimes go to an aerobics class in a studio above a bookstore not far from my house. a bookstore where Van Morrison could sometimes be spotted reading at a table in the cafe. i'd see Carlos Santana having lunch at my favorite sandwich spot. when you live in Marin County (which i did for a total of about 8 years in 5 different towns), you're used to seeing celebrities--it's no big deal.

i love Mill Valley. i've never known why it tugs at me so hard. maybe it's the physical environment. there are redwoods there and since i'm from redwood country, redwood groves instantly make me feel at home. when i read Linda's post, i suddenly realized i didn't know anything about Mill Valley's history. my genealogy research has given me a new fascination for history. so i looked it up at Wikipedia. well, looky there...in the mid-1800's: "Some of the rest of his land was leased out for dairy farming to Portuguese settlers.^[13] A majority of the immigrants came from the Azores Islands." i haven't yet figured out how my paternal great-grandparents made their way from the Azores to Del Norte County. wouldn't that be something to learn that as part of their journey, they went through Mill Valley. and this: "...Ranch 'B' is one of the few remaining dairy farm buildings and located near the parking lot at the Tennessee Valley trailhead." i haven't been to Tennessee Valley in ages, but i've hiked to the beach there dozens of times in the past and probably looked at and walked right by that building.

the more i study my family's genealogy (on all sides), the more i realize just how small this world really is...and just how much wonder is waiting to be discovered.

everyone has a story.

last night i watched episode 2 of season 2 of NBC's Who Do You Think You Are? last night's episode traced the ancestry of country singer Tim McGraw's fraternal lineage. episode 1 last week did the same with actress/singer Vanessa Williams. both were fascinating. what i love so much about the show is not that it's about the ancestry of celebrities--the series uses celebrities to hook our interest, since we might not tune in if the promo said we'd be viewing ancestral research for Bob down the street (Americans are nothing if not shallow)-- it's what i learn about our history that compels me to watch it. what i learn about our nation's history and the people who comprise the fabric of its very existence.

and just like last Friday night, as soon as the show was over, i made coffee (J was at a gig) and logged onto Ancestry to dig further into my own family's history. i did extensive research on my family tree last year at Ancestry, mostly on my mother's side. what's ironic is that prior to that, i knew much less about my maternal lineage than i did about my father's side of the family, yet i've been able to learn tons more about mom's side than dad's at the site. (but not to worry re my dad's lineage, a distant cousin's husband traced my Italian roots back to the 1700's about a decade ago. still working on finding our Azores Islands roots on the Portuguese side.) next thing i knew, 3-1/2 hours had gone by.

i can easily lose hours rooting around in my genealogical roots because each new piece of information leads to more questions. it's like putting together a giant puzzle that has tiny pieces. it really does make one wonder (at least it does me) about the power of DNA when you begin to see certain trends--certain patterns appearing in lives that are separated by generations.

last night i didn't feel like adding to my tree--seeing how far out i could stretch a particular branch. instead i decided to dig a little deeper on just one branch. i began to look for additional information on my nearest great-grandfathers on my maternal grandfather's side. in doing so, i came across a city directory from Omaha, Nebraska that listed three generations of great-grandfathers. i believe this one was dated 1889:

Milo S. Barnum was my great-great-great grandfather, Milo Seeley Barnum. (what a great name!) his son, my great-great-grandfather, was Jehiel R(ichards) Barnum and his son was my great-grandfather, Louis (it's misspelled in the directory) Octave Barnum. their ages would have been about 82, 50 and 20 when this directory was printed. Milo lived to be 88. he died in Omaha in 1895 and last night i found his burial plot information. Jehiel died young--he was only 52. he died before his father, in 1891. both he and his wife Marie-Adelaide (she was French-Canadian) are, i believe, buried in Omaha. my great-grandfather, Louis Octave, died in Port Hueneme, California (Ventura County) at age 75. his wife, my great-grandmother May Emmaline Ludlow (who i vaguely remember visiting when i was about seven) is buried in Weed, California, about three hours north of here. that's where my younger brother and i visited her when she lived in a trailer park next to my maternal grandparents.

my great-great-great grandfather, Milo, was born in Enosburg, Vermont in 1806. Enosburg is in northern Vermont, near Quebec. in 1834, he married Abigail Flint in Shipton, Quebec. in their later years, they ended up in Iowa and last night i learned that Abigail is buried in Dunlap, Iowa. Milo is listed as a farmer in that Omaha directory. it makes me wonder what sorts of crops he grew and what compelled him to relocate to Iowa from Quebec. it's not like his wife Abigail was from there--she was born in Danville, Quebec. did they know people in Iowa? had they heard stories about it being good farming land? Dunlap is near Omaha, even though it's in the next state, so Milo's relocation to Omaha isn't surprising.

Milo and Abigail gave birth to my great-great-grandfather Jehiel in Danville, Quebec in 1839. he married Marie-Adelaide Morin in Quebec at age 26. by the time he was 41 in 1880, they were living in Omaha. the Barnum men lived to ripe old ages (my grandfather lived to be 85)--what was the cause of Jehiel's death at age 52?

Jehiel's son, Louis Octave, my great-grandfather, was born in Quebec in 1868. some documents say he was born in Danville, but the U.S. Naturalization form he completed in 1924 lists his birthplace as St. Johnsburg, Quebec. he married May in 1892 and they were in Omaha in 1900. but they left Omaha and moved to Calgary, Alberta for a time. i just learned this last night when i found them listed on a 1916 Canadian census form. they later moved to Tacoma, Washington and ended up migrating southward. 

i'm sure you see how you could lose hours and hours rooting around digging to find information on just a handful of people, and by now i have hundreds in my family tree at Ancestry!  i could literally spend the rest of my life on this 'work' and if i did, i suspect i'd never find it anything less than fascinating. i realize that reading this may not be interesting to anyone else. but i truly do love hearing about everyone's ancestry, because it's each of our individual stories that has created our grand national story.

as synchronicity would have it, this morning's Daily Om email was titled, "Everyone Has a Story":

It's easy to forget sometimes that everyone has a story to tell if we take the time to listen. We are so accustomed to hearing the stories of people in the news that we sometimes lose track of the fact that the random stranger on the bus also has a fascinating story about where they came from and how they got to be where they are. The sheer variety of paths taken in this world, from farmers to CEOs to homeless people to world travelers, is indicative of how much we can learn from each individual.

that's just my way of saying that if you'd like to share any of your family's story in the comments, please feel free to do so. as Frasier Crane used to say, "i'm listening..."

The 1st Annual Marilyn Awards

the final Reverb 10 prompt from Molly O'Neill is:  "Core Story. What central story is at the core of you, and how do you share it with the world?"

it's awards season in the film industry. i love films and this time of year i enjoy reading about the nominations, seeing films and performances that have been nominated, watching the awards shows and chatting with my fellow film lovers. since story is at the core of what makes a good film, it was what came to mind when i read today's prompt. i thought it might be fun to look back at my year by sharing some of this year's moments and stories in a nominations format. may i present the 1st Annual Marilyn Awards...

Best Art Direction - Bellagio Arboretum in Las Vegas

Best Cinematography - Flickr's 10.10.10 project (this is my shot)

Best Makeup - The nominations committe could not find enough instances of makeup use to even come up with a nomination, let alone an award. Check back next year.

Best Costume Design - thrift store pumpkin

Best Song - "Happy Birthday" performed for me by Joe Louis Walker and his band (with J on drums) from the stage in Nevada City, CA

Best Soundtrack - Fremont Street Experience in Las Vegas

Best Visual Effects - 4th of July fireworks in Watertown, SD

Best Series, Drama - my mom's life

Best Series, Comedy - my brother's life

Best Mini-Series - my relationship with J

Best Writing - Adapted Screenplay - Reverb 10

Best Writing - Original Screenplay - my poem in Creative Is a Verb

Best Documentary - Amgen Tour of California

Best Documentary Short Subject - Amelie

Best Film Editing - forgiveness for snapping a big chunk of grievance out of the loop that continuously plays in my head

Best Ensemble - my family for their performance in the 2-week run of South Dakota Family Vacation

Breakthrough Performance - my niece Ciara for her first solo plane ride and vacation

Best Actress in a Supporting Role - me in my roles as spouse, daughter, sister, aunt

Best Actress in a Leading Role - me in my role as interviewer at La Salonniere - the interviewing is genuine...it took some acting (as if) on my part to convince myself to do it.  ;)

Best First Feature - La Salonniere

Cecil B DeMille Award - my mother

Robert Altman Award - the community of creative bloggers, tweeters and Facebookers who are my tribe

Best Film - storyboarding my dreams (i suspect this will be the winner next year, too.)  ;)

here's a poem i wrote a few years ago that i recently came across...and, yes, it's called "storyboard your dreams"...

break the mold that's
grown around your
forgotten desires open
the windows and let the
air circulate around your
spirit so you can hold
your heart in your
hands until its wings
unfurl break the slumber
that's become your
mind's thoughts the
numbing drumming of
doubts that have formed
the backbeat of your
life write a new
soundtrack and
storyboard your dreams
casting yourself to the
winds as star

wishing everyone a beautiful, bright, shiny 2011. may your heart's wings unfurl in the coming year. xo

reverb 10 - ordinary joy

i'm excited to kick off the last week of 2010 with a brand-new interview at La Salonniere! this week i'm talking with the always-delightful illustrator/animator Linda Davick. Linda brightens the blogosphere with her colorfully creative worldview. hope you enjoy it.

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it's day 27 of Reverb 10 and the prompt is from Brene Brown:  "Ordinary joy. Our most profound joy is often experienced during ordinary moments. What was one of your most joyful ordinary moments this year?" 

i had a hard time picking just one moment. then it occurred to me that talking about the moment stripped it of some of its joy for me. so in lieu of words, i offer a snapshot of some of my joyfully ordinary moments in 2010 where i could feel my body exhale...my heart smile...my soul relax...

reverb 10 - 5 minutes

it made me happy to open up the daily email from Reverb 10 this morning and find that the 15th prompt is from my dear friend Patti Digh. Patti's prompt is:  "5 minutes. Imagine you will completely lose your memory of 2010 in five minutes. Set an alarm for five minutes and capture the things you most want to remember about 2010." i adore Patti and i love this prompt. okay, here goes...

i want to remember all of those moments with Amelie when she came to visit us. how she reminded me how very important coloring is...and how when you talk to ducks, it's best to get down to their level.

i want to remember how at the beginning of April i decided that since i had a lot of time on my hands this would be the year i'd really follow my life-long team, the San Francisco Giants...and all of those hours i spent watching games (when i very seldom even watch TV)...what joy it gave me...how it gave a rhythm to my days...how it reminded me to practice patience...and to never give up, because often when things seemed really hopeless they quickly turned around. i want to remember how utterly gleeful i felt when they kept winning in the post-season...and how when they won the World Series it seemed like a dream...like somehow their kismet might rub off on all of us who'd had a hard year, but had been given so much happiness by their joyful wins.

i want to remember all of those two weeks of moments when i was traveling with my family the first half of July. how i felt fishing on that lake in rural South Dakota with my brother and niece...how long it had been since i'd been out in nature with no one around. the cabin in the Black Hills...reading Pete Dexter's Deadwood when we were in Deadwood...visiting Mount Moriah Cemetery, like Western folklore come to life. i want to remember fishing...how i'd avoided it my entire life and how it felt so right and natural...how i loved the zen of it...and offered a prayer of gratitude to the fish for feeding us.

okay, my time's already up. i'd just like to offer a personal thank you to Patti who has single-handedly reminded me this year that i can, and sometimes do, write...by publishing one of my poems in Creative Is a Verb...and letting me see a bright spot for the spring when i'll have another piece in her new book.

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today at Wishcasting Wednesday, Jamie asks, "How do you wish to soar?"  by taking the best elements of 2010 and expanding them in 2011. more travel...more road trips...i'd like to take a long train trip in 2011...more music...more baseball...more writing...much more photography. i want to put more attention and energy into the things that truly make my heart sing and let them help me soar. often we make it so complicated...when really all we have to do is close our eyes...lift our 'wings'...and let go.

 (me, on the beach in my hometown, mid-90's)

reverb 10 - make

Gretchen Rubin of The Happiness Project provides the day 6 prompt for Reverb 10:  "Make. What was the last thing you made? What materials did you use? Is there something you want to make, but you need to clear some time for it?"  i really love Gretchen's project and greatly enjoyed her book. my post about it at the beginning of the year (which Gretchen kindly commented on) is here.

my answer to this prompt dovetails nicely with a lovely Jamaica Kincaid quote Gretchen posted on her blog yesterday:

"Why is a picture of something real eventually more exciting than the thing itself?"

last month my youngest niece, Ciara, turned 13. when i was visiting my mother in Las Vegas last summer, we went through a big box of her photos. she wanted to downsize the photos she was keeping and gave a big batch of them to me to disperse to various family members. since many of the photos of Ciara were of her infancy and toddlerhood, i suggested that for her birthday we put together a photo album for her. my mother could supply the photos and i'd create the album. so that's what we did.

adolescence is, for many of us, one of the funnest times of our lives, but also one of the most painful. i wrote unexpected captions for the photos and short paragraphs filled with what i hoped would be life lessons and tidbits of wisdom as she entered this big life milestone. they were worded to be funny and clever and sometimes poignant. i won't re-create them here, but i'll share some of the lessons i shared with her.

i told her that sometimes as a teenager she's going to think that parents just don't get it, and then let her in on a little secret--that they thought the same thing about their parents...who thought the same thing about theirs.  i acknowledged that adolescence is a time that's all about friends and shared with her that sometimes even our closest friends can let us down or hurt our feelings. i told her she'll get her heart broken, but not to worry about it because it happens to everyone. i admitted that she might feel embarrassed by her family at times (what teenager hasn't felt embarrassed by her parents?), but that ultimately it's her family (all of us) who love her unconditionally and will always be there for her no matter what. (and i made sure to include photos of all of us in the album.) i warned her that there will be a ton of societal and peer pressure to have her body look a certain way, but to love her body as it is because it's already beautiful and it's hers alone.

there were no fancy art supplies used in making this album. i'm not crafty by nature, but the end result was cute. i used a 3-ring binder album, some construction paper to cut out different background shapes and typed captions in a cute font. i remembered that i had some peel-and-stick letters left over from another project that i used to spell out her name on the cover. i only filled the first half of the album, telling her that the other half was for her to store keepsakes and memories of her 13th year.

my nieces and nephew are like a lot of American kids these days--they're pretty spoiled. my brother and sister-in-law aren't wealthy, but their children typically get whatever they've asked for for birthdays and Christmas. but i think sometimes we underestimate kids. i wanted to give C. something special and unique...and she loved it.

so in answer to Jamica Kincaid's question that appears on Gretchen's blog, i don't know if it's that the photos seem more real as much as it is that they give us a shortcut  into that place in our hearts where we store some of our most cherished memories.

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for today's A Month of Music i'm going with a great, catchy pop song from the early 80's by one of my favorite singer-songwriters, Bonnie Hayes.  it was on the soundtrack of the film Valley Girl, which happened to be the first film directed by Martha Coolidge...and the first one where Nicolas Coppola was billed as Nicolas Cage.  :) 

 

reverb 10 - moment

Ali Edwards provides the day 3 prompt for Reverb 10:  "Moment. Pick one moment when you felt most alive this year. Describe it in vivid detail (texture, smells, voices, noises, colors)."

this was taken on July 4th inside the stadium in Watertown, South Dakota. that's my youngest niece, Ciara, taking in the fireworks. (you can just see her outline.) she was a wearing a cute black-and-white sundress my mother had sent her. my brother (her dad) was sitting to our right. it was a very warm evening and there were a lot of people inside the stadium, both in the stands and spread out picnic-style on the grass. they had food and drink booths set up inside the stadium. we each had a sweaty bottle of cold water and Ciara had a box of candy. it was a great fireworks show with lots of color. there was a rock soundtrack being played over the P.A. system and it was accompanied by a lot of delighted oooh's and aaaah's from the crowd.

it was my first day in South Dakota that trip, having just completed a three-day road trip with my parents and Ciara. i remember this moment vividly because it had been such a classically All-American day. we'd left Gillette, Wyoming that morning...run through a rainstorm in Rapid City to get drinks at a Starbucks...had lunch at a diner filled with vintage car memorabilia in Murdo...stopped at a large rest stop visitor center at the Missouri River to take in some history...and driven through the flat farmlands of eastern South Dakota to reach my brother's house in Henry. my brother and sister-in-law had prepared a classic picnic-style dinner of barbecued ribs, corn on the cob, salad and watermelon. then the three of us jumped into my brother's pickup for the 15-minute drive to Watertown to take in the fireworks show. 

i was tired. we'd been on the road for days and it had already been a very full day, but i was so glad i'd gone with them. they'd moved to South Dakota nine months earlier. Ciara and i had always been close and i was thrilled that i was getting to spend some time with her over the summer. she didn't know that i took this picture. i leaned back on the bleacher seat, snapped and was delighted that i had somehow captured both a splash of fireworks and the faint outline of her with my little point-and-shoot. i remember thinking that i would want to remember this...to remind myself that beautiful memories await us...but it's up to us to go out and capture them.

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for Jen's A Month of Music, here are the Mamas and Papas with "California Dreamin'"...

 

 

Amelie

sorry for my absence here last week. our granddaughter, Amelie (who'll be 2 on the 19th), came to visit us with her Grandma Theresa (her mom's mom) from Portland. they arrived early Tuesday morning and left Sunday afternoon. we had a lot of fun with her.  she's smart, funny, quick, sweet, determined and for a 2-year-old, sort of...well...centered. she seems rather like an old soul to me. i've been around plenty of toddlers, but she really didn't fuss much for a 2-year old. hardly at all, really. see that photo in the bottom row where she has her hands over her ears? that's her technique for when she's on overload. unlike a lot of toddlers this age, she doesn't pitch a fit or start throwing a tantrum. she just stops, stands perfectly still, puts her hands over her ears and gives you that look. i actually sort of admire that technique. it's like she's giving herself a time-out.  :) 

we discovered she likes mardis gras beads, coloring, bubbles, ducks, sliding doors, sprinklers, bubble baths, the 'corn bath' at the pumpkin patch, and William Wegman's brilliant children's video "Alphabet Soup."

her Papa (J) is totally smitten. he played beads with her, gave her a foot massage, came home from a museum gig and immediately sat down to draw and color with her without even taking off his suit. he also repaired a doggy flashlight we found at the thrift store and she had loads of fun shining it in the dark. we celebrated her birthday a few days early and i think her favorite birthday gift was the snazzy pink and black sneakers Papa picked out for her. they have hearts on the side that light up when she runs, and she quickly learned to step into the darkened hallway and stamp her feet to make them work without having to run.  ;)

we walked to the UC Davis arboretum and fed the ducks. we went to the farmers market and she got a heart painted on her arm. we shopped at the thrift store on 2 for 1 day and found a cute wooden cart, the doggy flashlight, several videos and that jack-o-lantern costume you see in the photos. we went to the pumpkin patch and spent a lot of time playing in the corn bath. we drew and colored many, many sheets of recycled paper. it made me laugh every time she patted the floor next to her...that was my cue to come take a seat, it was time to color.  ;)  she liked sitting at my desk and leaving me copious notes on the yellow legal pad there.

all in all, we had a swell time. when she was born, we decided she would call me Moo Moo (which is what my nieces and nephew have always called me). her other grandma is Mimi. in one tiny meltdown moment, she suddenly cried out "Mi-Moo!"...which made us laugh.

Amelie is a very special girl and we're so blessed that she's graced our lives with her presence. we loved having her here and look forward to many, many more special times together.

South Dakota

the entire Flickr set is here.

i arrived home late Friday afternoon after 15 days of travel with family. it included a 3-day road trip to my brother's home in eastern, rural South Dakota with my dad, stepmom and Ciara. we arrived on the 4th of July in time for a BBQ dinner and then my brother took C and i to Watertown to see the fireworks. my sister-in-law painted, furnished and decorated the loft space off Ciara's room into a beautiful guest room and that was my haven for about a week. we took side trips to Sioux Falls...to Marshall, MN to see my nephew Zak pitch in an American Legion game (in a beautiful American Legion park)...to Minneapolis for dinner downtown along the riverfront before Kayla's arrival at the airport...and a day of shopping at Mall of America (which made both nieces very happy). we drove home from Minnesota with tornado activity a few dozen miles north of us (exciting!) we road-tripped across South Dakota to the Black Hills for 3 nights in a cabin in the hills outside Lead...stopping along the way in the Badlands and Wall (for lunch and some tourist-y shopping). the cabin was beautiful...set among the aspens...3 floors...4 bedrooms, 2 baths, hot tub. i shared the loft bedroom with the girls. we spent one day seeing the sights in Deadwood and another day visiting the Crazy Horse monument and the quintessentially American Mt. Rushmore. Kayla and i flew home together from Rapid City.

it's hard to be on someone else's vacation, especially when you're used to leading a very independent life. my brother had wanted us to all be together this summer and my folks had never been to South Dakota, so this trip was really for all of them. when you're sleeping in lofts and sharing hotel rooms, it can be a challenge to spend 2 weeks w/o any privacy...or to feel your heart tug a bit as you whiz by yet another potentially gorgeous photo that won't be captured by your camera because others are deciding where to stop. that said, i'm enormously grateful that i could tag along since between my brother and dad, they picked up most of my expenses.

my brother took me fishing on two different lakes three different times...once with each niece and the last time with our Dad. i caught a walleye and two trout. i'd never been fishing before!  (shocking considering my brother's a former commercial fisherman.) as a girl i'd once begged my dad to take me and he did...but once i learned he was going to expect me to bait my own hook and touch the fish, my fishing career was over before it had started. but i didn't have to touch any worms (we used lures) and my brother unhooked each of my fish...a walleye and two trout. i was surprised to find it so relaxing and rather zen-like.

the sights were lovely and the weather was perfect. there was a major lightening storm one night that seemed to last for hours. being a native Californian, I'm used to the hills turning golden and brown in the summertime, so i was surprised at how green everything was both in eastern South Dakota and western Minnesota...miles and miles of green fields and crops. (i've never seen so many cornfields in my life!) 

i stumbled upon M. J. Andersen's memoir, Portable Prairie, on a sale table at Wall Drug and picked it up for $4.99. sacrilege! it's fabulous and i encourage you to read it even if you have no interest in South Dakota. it's about our quest for home and what that word even means to us. she's also very witty.

i also read Pete Dexter's brilliant Western, Deadwood. me, reading a Western...i know!  it's a great book and it was really fun to go to Deadwood as i was nearing the end of it. 

and in the gift shop at Crazy Horse i picked up The Journey of Crazy Horse which i'm about halfway through. it's a lovely book, though it's hard not to feel some white guilt and shame while reading it. it's beautiful to read about the Lakota way.

i took a sabbatical from Twitter and Facebook while i was traveling and though i've been home a couple of days, i can't seem to get myself to jump all the way back into them. i suspect my social media engagement is going to be a little quieter for the remainder of the summer as i work through what my next steps will be.

hope you're having a wonderful July.

digital sabbatical

i've just read this post at Gwen Bell's site...about how she's taking a month-long digital sabbatical in July...and, boy, does that sound appealing. so i've decided to do the same...sort of. after all, it already appears that i'm taking a summer sabbatical on my blog.

first i wanted to give you an update on Colleen's (Communicatrix) annual goals process i mentioned in the last post. i've been doing it daily for about 6 weeks. in that time, i may have missed about 4 days...days when i woke late (for me) and was dashing about to get somewhere quickly and didn't give myself a few minutes of focused contemplation before starting my day. but overall i've been quite diligent. i've tweaked Colleen's method in a couple of ways to adapt it to what i needed right now.

since i didn't already have a list of concrete annual goals, i've allowed mine to morph over the weeks...to sort of crystallize naturally within the process. so instead of starting off with 10 goals and then religiously writing down the same 10 daily, i've dropped a few along the way and seen a few others morph into something else.

the other tweak is that i've added a section on the back of each daily page. i write the annual goals at the top of the page in my spiral notebook and my daily to-do list (with check-off boxes) in the bottom half of the page, just as Colleen does. but the next morning, before i start a new page, i flip over the previous day's page and write the heading "(date) unexpected gifts"...because every single day contains surprises and gifts that we couldn't have anticipated. i suppose it's a form of retroactive gratitude...to remind myself that even on days when i felt down or like nothing went 'right,' there's always a gift in there somewhere.

early tomorrow morning i leave for a 3-day road trip with some family members, followed by a couple of weeks with a bunch of my family half a country away. since i really am a Luddite at heart...i don't own a laptop or smartphone or netbook...i'm going to allow myself some truly offline time during the first half of July. like Gwen, i've been active on Twitter since 2007. in fact, i found Gwen that summer when she was live-tweeting BlogHer. it's been delightful to watch her online presence grow and blossom. like Gwen, i've been blogging since 2003...and social media has changed dramatically in the last 7 years. what i've always liked about Gwen is that even online, she seems to radiate a sort of centeredness and authenticity. maybe that's her long-time yoga practice at work, i don't know. but i suspect it's also due to having the foresight to take breaks from all the chatter when she needs to. so kudos to her for taking a July sabbatical.

when i return in mid-July, i'll decide if i want to stay offline for the remainder of the month or dip my toes back in slowly. you know, it's funny. summer is my favorite season by far, and for that reason, July has always been my favorite month. maybe that stems from summer vacations during school years. some of June was always spent in school and August meant preparing to go back...but July was untouched by obligation. i'd like to experience another July like that...one that's not about keeping up...just being me.

wishing you a great July.