tongue and groove

my 10 for 2010

in my last post, i wrote that my first "commandment" for my year of YES would be to "be Marilyn." Gretchen Rubin created 12 Commandments for herself in The Happiness Project. i think i'm going to go with 10...in no particular order...

1. be Marilyn

2. listen

3. i'm ok just as i am

4. there are no rules

5. splurge

6. do only what i want

7. let it go

8. stay present

9. be kind

10. stay open

Gretchen also made a list of what she calls "Secrets of Adulthood." i'm going to start compiling a list of those for myself, but it may be on ongoing thing. here's the first one i just came up with...while taking a shower:

keep a notebook in the bathroom. start jotting down all those ideas i get while standing in the shower.

i get great ideas in the shower all the time.  do i ever write them down?  no.  by the time i'm dressed, they've dissipated into the ether like the steam in the bathroom.  that's a lot of lost ideas.  time to start rounding them up.  ;)

being me.

when Gretchen Rubin decided to embark on her year-long The Happiness Project, one of the first things she did was take some overarching principles and come up with her "Twelve Commandments."  the first one?  "Be Gretchen."  well, duh, you might be thinking...of course...just be yourself.  but that's a very hard thing for some of us to do if from early on in our lives, others have told us what we like to do.  and even if we hate doing what they insist we like to do, we keep doing it.  because that's what nice girls do, right?  they say yes to be nice...say yes to doing things others want them to do...because it's not nice to say no.  and i had to put that in bold...BECAUSE IT JUST DAWNED ON ME.

there's something about me that confuses people...that makes them think i'm something i'm not.  is it because i wear glasses?  is it my quiet outward demeanor?  is it my face?  i don't know what it is. i just know that often people take a first impression screen grab of me and refuse to budge from whatever ideas they've formed based on it...no matter how much i protest that they've got figured me all wrong.   so let me set the record straight about who i am and what i'm not. i'm going to use the MBTI types in this post just because they easily summarize what i'm trying to convey.

here's how many people tend to see me:

ISTJ

Quiet, serious, earn success by thoroughness and dependability. Practical, matter-of-fact, realistic, and responsible. Decide logically what should be done and work toward it steadily, regardless of distractions. Take pleasure in making everything orderly and organized – their work, their home, their life. Value traditions and loyalty.

but here's what i really am...and not just because i'm randomly picking a type, but because whenever i've taken the Myers-Briggs test, this has been the result:

INFP

Idealistic, loyal to their values and to people who are important to them. Want an external life that is congruent with their values. Curious, quick to see possibilities, can be catalysts for implementing ideas. Seek to understand people and to help them fulfill their potential. Adaptable, flexible, and accepting unless a value is threatened.

yes, i'm an introvert, but the rest couldn't be more different.

in my year of YES, i'm going to be working to BE MARILYN. not the version some people have convinced themselves is me...but the real me. so i thank Gretchen Rubin for stating the obvious (because even though it's obvious, it's all too easy to forget)...that the #1 decision-making factor in life is, "if i do this, will i BE ME?"